"The Handmaiden" (2016) - A Fan Review

Last night I witnessed cinematic genius. An evoking erotic tale of passion, betrayal, perversion, and ultimately what it means when love knows no bounds. Below is my fan review. I'm no film critic and I'm also very easily impressed when it comes to movies. However this film majorly exceeded all my expectations. Also I speak remotely frankly about sexual content here, so if that makes you uncomfortable, perhaps sit this one out!

Very spoiler-ish! Proceed with caution!

Firstly, I was very happy to share this film experience with someone I knew would appreciate it as deeply as I would, someone very dear to me whom I love very much, Celinè. Its tale of forbidden love and tangled webs, yet in the end love will always prevail no matter what difficulty stands in your way. We saw the film at Sunshine Cinema in Soho, a humble little theater that carries indie and foreign films. It was really an evening never to forget.

Instead of giving a play-by-play of this film, I really want to speak about what really sets this movie apart from many others that have erotic themes that are centered on that of women's sexuality.

Not only was this movie absolutely stunning to watch, with its glorious scenery, amazing costumes, and spellbinding mixing of European and Asian (Korean and Japanese) aesthetics, it played against the tune that you usually see in a lot of Western films (and perhaps many other Eastern films) that use women as props of sexual fantasy. Women who have sexual relationships with other women usually are given no agency over their bodies, and their intimacy is often directed for the male gaze and for shock value. Like "look we are so edgy, women having sex!" types of things that are overdone and boring. For many years, I've sought out film, animation, manga, and other media that does not play into these selfish tropes that ignore how real it is for a woman to love another woman as deeply as she could a man.

The Handmaiden did just that. With its ultimate plot twist that had me on the edge of my seat, and worried for a moment that I had been queer-baited into yet another story of a lesbian woman losing out to a cruel and unloving man, watching the love of her life swept away forever, I was absolutely floored when this movie took all my expectations and blew them out of the water. It also eliminated any fears I had going in about halfway through the film. These women went against all odds and found themselves passionately involved with one another in a twist of fate that you won't see coming until the very end. 

We witnessed real love last night. Love that is timid at first, perhaps shameful and worrisome. Queer women often have to question their agency, question whether or not their love for another woman is real or allowed. Suppressing their feelings or having them suppressed by others around them. I know all these feelings firsthand, and this movie really spoke to my very soul. Though I personally identify as bi/pan, for many years I wondered if I had been broken and if my feelings were real or allowed. I've personally learned in many ways, that I can love any way that I so please. This movie really set those feelings into my heart.

There are very clear differences between heterosexual love and intimacy and homosexual love and intimacy, and besides the obvious physical differences that I'm sure I don't need to explain, I've found that it really does go far beyond that. Not that one is better than the other, I'm not here to make statements of division, but I think there is much to learn about passion and intimacy between all orientations and sexual expressions. The erotic scenes in this film were not your "classic" -look at these two beautiful women having sex- for all the men to watch, and to carelessly objectify them as if they are just bodies to consume. I always get that vibe and the wrenching in my stomach when lots of other media does this, including obviously pornography (which is primarily consumed by male viewers, and only small studios cater to the female gaze.) 

The scenes in this movie made you feel something completely different. Whether you are straight or somewhere in between, everything felt so real, not staged, not forced. You could feel true passion emanating from the movie screen. I never thought that this was possible, especially in a scene depicting two women. 

I was deeply moved to say the least. 

Then there were other moments of implied eroticism. Things that, perhaps those who may not be as "creative" to see it. There are things that can be experienced that go beyond that of sexual touch. There were scenes of light grazing on inherently non-sexual body parts, dressing and undressing, the way the two women looked at one another, so much to be said about how fantasy isn't as simple as many are led to believe. The anticipation and lingering of longing and desire are so much more enrapturing than the acts themselves. Not to make a blanket statement, but I think this is the clear difference between how different genders and individuals experience sexual fulfillment (if they so desire that from their partner.) The end game is not always as rewarding as what led up to it.

Sometimes, the odds against you only makes the end result that much more exciting.

This movie wasn't about in-your-face sex off the bat. That's what really made it so entrancing. You were left imagining and wondering how far things would go with every slow and provoking moment. 

Also the two leading ladies (Sook-Hee played by Kim Tae-Ri and and Lady Hideko played byKim Min-Hee) are just gorgeous to say the least! They are just the loveliest paring and their love felt so genuine I would swear to you they were real lovers (Are they? Because that would be amazing.) I was completely fixated on them. 

I loved how the both of them thought the other was innocent and naive, when in fact both ladies were remotely corrupted by those around them and their toxic influence. But in the end, it made them all the wiser to prevail and triumph, and realize that what they had for another was worth the ultimate risks.

They were caught up in an elaborate scheme of greed and perversion orchestrated by a money-loving con man and a lecherous old uncle. Boy, if this movie didn't make you distrusting of men, I don't know what would! Not that you should (#notallmen, haha), as both men depicted in this film were just downright skeevy! The creepy old uncle Kouzuki, forced young Hideko into erotic readings and displays for an underground "sex club" (like Fight Club, just a little more twisted.) And Sook-Hee was manipulated into conman Count Fujiwara's exploits to seduce and elope with the young heiress Hideko to have her fortune. 

Watch the movie to see how it all unfolds in detail, but I just have to say, these lovely ladies knew exactly what they were doing when it came to intimacy. 

Or perhaps they did not? 

I think they both surprised each other in how naturally things unfolded. That in of itself is the real beauty of it all. 

A woman knows how she wants to be loved, and in turn can easily love another with the same passion they would like to be loved themselves. This my friends, is the key to long lasting and satisfying encounters, regardless if they are long standing, exclusive, varied, or otherwise. 

Take notes. 

I was really astonished by this film and I beg everyone to see it, no matter if you have an alternative sexual expression or not, I think it's well worth it. We plan on purchasing the DVD as soon as it is released because this type of cinematic glory is rare and to be cherished deeply. 

We also are very interested in reading "Fingersmith" by Sara Waters, which this movie was roughly based upon. Any manner of media detailing and displaying the lives and inner workings of LGBTQA+ romance, and validating it without vulgarizing it or perverting it, please continue to create them and share! If anyone has suggestions of media that do this, feel free to drop them in the comments as we are very intrigued by them. 

Thank you all for reading, please support this film by going to see it in a specialty theater near you. Showings are limited and dwindling, so please hurry!

All photo credits to Magnolia Pictures

I'm Demisexual: What Does That Mean? My Experience

Recently (or not so recently) I've gotten to thinking about my sexuality. Sure, for me that is a multi faceted topic for more reasons than one, but today I'd like to focus in on a very specific aspect of mines.

Demisexuality.

It wasn't until recently that I ever even heard of this term. As I have "come of age", now at the near quarter century age of twenty four (frankly with more living to do), I have used many different words to describe my sexual preferences, but demisexual was a new one. When I finally read up on what that meant, I felt like I had a new clear cut answer for myself, well at least part of it!

Growing up, I had a hard time connecting with people. I had small groups of friends, and even then there was usually only one or two within the circle I truly had a bond with. I was, and still am, very introverted and being in social situations for too long exhausts me. Even in my romantic relationships, I really value the time I get to spend alone. For this reason, maintaining and sustaining connections can prove difficult.

In addition, as the definition of demisexual describes:

"A demisexual is a person who does not experience sexual attraction unless they form a strong emotional connection with someone. It's more commonly seen in but by no means confined to romantic relationships. The term demisexual comes from the orientation being "halfway between" sexual and asexual."

I would have never thought that my feelings had fallen anywhere on the asexual spectrum, because I do feel sexual attraction, but the way that I do is definitely not conventional. When friends or classmates would shove celebrities in my face and ask if I found them attractive, I would be very confused by this, and also quite uncomfortable? Especially if they asked about men (usually very masculine men), because I find that I simply cannot find a man purely attractive unless I know them personally and also because I'm not really into men who are hyper masculine (as many women tend to be, not all but many.) With women I am attracted to aesthetic beauty, but I usually cannot see any further than that unless I really knew her.

I was never one to obsess over celebs and their looks. I was more attracted to talent, artists, musicians, they made me feel something, but even still it never really went that deep. It was very surface feelings, very fantasy, I knew they were not real. I always felt like there was something missing that did not allow me to pass the threshold of blatant sexual attraction. Looks are simply not enough for me to form those feelings?

Attraction is a spectrum. If I had to definitively describe mines, on a 1-10 scale of "masculine" to "feminine" it would be a 7. I love androgyny and hyper femininity. I like men who are less masculine, and women who are super feminine or androgynous. My sexuality not black and white.

Attraction for me is also not always (and not usually) sexual. I am attracted to people for purpose of friendship way more often than romantics. I also extend non-sexual intimacy to a few close friends. I hug, hold hands, and snuggle up with close friends whenever possible so long as they are comfortable with me doing so or offer. I have always been that way.

In romantic and intimate relationships, it has always been friendship first. Sure, I had your run of the mill crushes as a kid, but they were all unrequited, and now I know why.

I was never friends with them. They were arbitrary. Fleeting, non-existing, not real. Thus they never really went anywhere. Perhaps some of the attraction was forced. "I'm a girl, you have to have a crush, pick one and hold that to your heart for the semester" I would tell myself. Just boys then, even that felt half-hearted. Pen them in your secret diaries, make it seem real.

Then the crushing realization that it would never be, and now as an adult with a much less narrow and cut and dry sexual identity, and a new found understanding of myself, I embrace myself for who I am and I'm not afraid to show it.

I'm not broken. I shouldn't feel like an alien when I'm not "hot in here" attracted to some shirtless underwear ad of some random model or celeb. Because, who is that person? When you have that one friend who is literally shoving pictures in your face and yelling "So you think he's cute? Huh? Right!?" and you're just looking at them with confusion and disdain? I refuse to be shamed because of it. I don't experience attraction like she does, and I'm not going to let her make me seem like something is wrong with me.

It's not that I don't experience sexual attraction or desire sex, but those things are really exclusive feelings that I have not felt or experienced with many people and that is fine with me. There is nothing wrong with me.

I'm Demisexual.

Do share your thoughts in the comments, I'd love to hear them!

One Dress, Three Ways - Coordinate Series - Inori The Maiden of Versailles JSK

Hello Everyone! For today's post, I'm doing a new coordinate series called "One Dress, Three Ways" where I challenge myself to create three distinct outfits in different styles using one main lolita piece! 

I also challenge my other fellow Lolita bloggers to do it too! I'd love to see what you all come up with!

I bought this dress on a whim when I saw Jo Anna (@octavekitten) post it on her Instagram/Facebook that she received it. I never seen it before and I automatically fell in love with it and needed to have it. It reminds me so much of Searching for Baroque from Baby, the Stars Shine Bright, which is one of my dream dresses. However, that dress is very hard to acquire and is very expensive second hand, so this was the next best thing. 

It also has a very JetJ feel to it, another brand I haven't been able to acquire main pieces from due to the fact that they can be so expensive. 

I purchased mines form Clobba Online, here's the link, they still have some available however in the black colorway only. I received my piece in about 2 weeks after purchasing. 

A quick review: The piece is extremely good quality for it's price. I was really astonished when I received it. The fabric is a very lightweight polyester and should be easy to clean and maintain. The bows are all detachable and so is the pearl chain, which makes it very versatile. I really can't say anything bad about this dress. It features gorgeously printed images of classic Rococo painting and artwork, and I love this theme! I will be purchasing from the brand Inori again!

As a side note, I keep saying it but I am so impressed by the Chinese Lolita Brands lately and I hope that they continue to go strong. Their quality in many ways rivals even that of the Japanese brands, and the designs are very unique and interesting many times. I'm itching to own a piece from Krad Lanrette, whom I would say is the leading Chinese Brand design and quality wise based on what I've heard from others, their only downfall is wait times and shipping complications. 

Anyway, on to the coordinates!

Coordinate I: Purely Classic

JSK: Inori The Maiden of Versailles

Blouse: Innocent World

Socks: Juliette et Justine

Bag: Evil Live

Crown: Voodoodolly

This is a very simple purely classic coordinate that fits with the Classic Lolita "trend" of gaudy accessories and prints. I paired the JSK with JetJ's Grimm's Fairytale socks which also has gilded frame motifs. It seems a bit out there, but it's my style and what I like. To take this outfit a step further, I would perhaps add an ivory lace trimmed veil and a long ivory lace underskirt (something that I'm waiting to add to my wardrobe!) 

Coordinate II: Dark Elegance

JSK: Inori The Maiden of Versailles

Blouse: Pumpkin Cat

Tights: Juliette et Justine

Bag: Evil Live

Necklace: Moss Marchen

Headdress & Veil: Made by Me

For the second look, I wanted to coordinate this JSK in a more Classic Gothic way. I love true Classic Lolita but I think I love Classic Gothic just a bit more (being a true Gothic Lolita at heart.) And yes, I did pair frames on frames again! It's a bit matchy matchy, but I don't know, I dig it! I could even do lace tights instead if the frames on frames is too much. 

Coordinate III: Subdued Romance

JSK: Inori The Maiden of Versailles

Blouse: Ancoco

Tights: Grimoire

Bag: Modcloth

Hat: Offbrand

Here is a more simplistic Otome styled outfit. I imagine wearing this outfit for a casual picnic or stroll on the boardwalk. Perhaps with an Ivory parasol. Instead of the tights, I could even pair this with ivory lace topped ankle socks. This is one of my favorite looks with this dress. It's the most wearable and comfortable!

Which coordinate is your favorite and why? Let me know in the comments!

And I challenge you all to do this coordinate series for yourself and see how many different outfits you can create using one main piece! It's so much fun to do. 

Until next time!

If My Soul Had a Soundtrack...

Ever wonder how your soul would sound if it had its own musical soundtrack? Does it change daily, according to your mood? Does it have a constant theme that carries through no matter how you are feeling? Or is it a single song alone?

I began thinking about this today after revisiting some music from one of my favorite bands, Avenged Sevenfold. I listened to a playlist on YouTube of some of their top songs, such as "Beast in the Harlot", "Bat Country", "Nightmare", and more. It really got me hyped up and I remembered why I love their music so much. Their sound is hardcore, almost vulgar, devilish, fast-paced most times, and highly melodic. Some of my favorite musical attributes are encompassed in their music.

I like a lot of Rock/Metal bands, but A7X is definitely close to my heart, along with bands like System of a Down, Slipknot, Green Day, to name a few. That's why I began thinking of what my soul would sound like if it had it's own soundtrack.

I think A7X's music is just that. That sound at least.

You must be thinking if you know me, or maybe if you don't know me, how the hell does a "sweet and mild mannered girl" like you get any type of Metal music from their soul?

When I discovered the Metal genre, it was something completely new and foreign to me. It was music that "people like me" aren't supposed to be listening too, i.e I'm a Black girl, so stuff like that is apparently "too white" for me. And maybe too "scary"?

Bullshit.

You see, I like what I like, and it usually takes me off the usual path. This goes for a lot of things. I also like a lot of different types of music, but if I had to honestly think of a certain sound of music that represents my soul, it would be melodic Metal music.

It's hard to choose just one band if I had to be honest, I like many, but A7X has this certain flair that, just speaks to me.

No I haven't betrayed you Moi dix Mois! 

My soul is always screaming out but its outside appearance is silent. I like to think if people on the street could hear the rhythm of my soul, they would be afraid of it. It takes just the right kind of people to listen to it and think it's amazing. I don't know if that makes sense to anyone, but I think about this a lot.

I'm a nice person, I'm not violent or anything, but I often feel underestimated by society and the people around me. I feel like people think my soul is meek. I often surprise people who don't know me as well when I'm dropping the names of my favorite Metal bands or belting out dark sounding melodies at a karaoke party. The surprise I get from people who don't know really amuses me!

When I was in high school, I used to listen to Metal really loudly on the train rides going to and from school (an hour long commute that sadly hasn't changed much since), and old grannies/aunties would stare at me and shake their heads in disgust and perhaps disbelief that it was coming from me. I even had one woman call me the devil in Spanish once. That also, coupled with the way I was dressed back then (Hot Topic Goth/Punk), probably made an impact. But I was always very small and young looking, even to this very day.

These encounters have shaped who I am, which is, a person full of surprising attributes, many that can't be uncovered at face value. I'm proud of that deception.

So sometimes I wish I could let people hear my inner soundtrack, people who believe I'm perhaps that meek individual who is easily manipulated, so they can hear the roar of M. Shadows and the hypnotic thrash of Syn's guitar and run away fearing for their lives.

I now it's a little silly, but it's something I often wish.

Only people that share my bond with their music, or at least understand it, will be welcomed into my world.

I really dislike when people approach me on the street or otherwise and think they have me all figured out! Well guess what, if you heard the soundtrack of my soul, if you are an ignorant person, you probably will be very confused.

It's like, step off already! You don't and will never get me.

I'm talking a lot of nonsense in this post, but if you understood any of that and can relate to me, please comment! I'd like to know what your soul would sound like if it had a soundtrack...

Thanks for reading!
- Aria

My Ancestry and What it Means to Me

Hello everyone! I'm here today with some interesting news, reflection, and self analysis. So about a month ago I did something I've wanted to do for many years, and that was to have my DNA tested for my ethnicity breakdown! I used Ancestry.com, and jumped at the opportunity to get tested when they had their Christmas sale (it was about $30 off the price of the test.)

Let's first speak about my cultural history. I identify as Afro-Carribean American. My mother was born in Antigua & Barbuda and my father was born in Jamaica. I am a first generation American born citizen. My parents immigrated here as young children (aged 4 and 7 respectively) and met each other in college here in New York City, my hometown. I've lived in the city my whole life. Most of my mother's side of the family from Antigua & Barbuda also immigrated here in the 1960's and 1970's, and many of my cousins are also first generation and second generation Americans.

That being said, without a doubt my family on both sides are descendants of slavery. The Trans-Atlantic slave trade brought slaves not only to the Americas, but the Caribbean Islands as well. This is the first piece in the puzzle of what I'd known my genetic makeup to be. I have been remotely aware of for the longest time. What I didn't know, was where the obvious European genetic attributes had come from.

An old-ish photo of me in my most "natural state", fro and all it's glory!

There is a lot of talk in my family about what parts of Europe we take bloodline from. Growing up I've heard everything from Portuguese, to Italian, to British. Many people swear up, down and around on the Portugal thing, so for most of my life that's what I would go around saying when people asked if I "must be mixed", even though at the end of the day I just say I'm a Black person, or Person of Color.

So what did my breakdown end up being? Let's have a look below...

Okay, so the 77% African thing didn't really come as a surprise, since that was basically a given, I mean pretty much everyone currently native to the Caribbean Islands has some type of bloodline that traces back to the Sub Saharan West African coast (and yes that does include Hispaniola and Puerto Rico!) I was pretty sure that I was going to get a pretty high percentage of Nigerian or Ghanian ethnic traces. It's very exciting to have some sort of knowledge of where my African blood originates. I studied both cultures in college, and now I'm even more eager to make an even deeper connection and do more research on where I come from.

My only sadness is that they cannot pinpoint exactly which cultural groups I bear lineage from, and there are SO MANY, Hausa, Fulani, Ashanti, Yoruba, Igbo, and more. But I'm sure I'm not from one cultural group in earnest because all the people of the region mixed together during the slave trade, so there really is no way to know. I basically have trace amounts of many! Which is still something to merit. Yes, slavery happened, but I won't let that define who I am or erase my culture.

So that brings us to the little European surprise I wasn't expecting.

Scandinavian?

When I saw this result I was very confused. I never heard anything about any Norwegian or Swedish ancestry of any kind in my family (probably because it was remotely illegitimate to begin with, for reasons I don't think I need to mention here, we all know what types of atrocities went down during the slave trade.)

So I'm quarter Viking? Okay...?

But after a small bit of research, it made a little more sense. Scandinavian nomads went EVERYWHERE. They migrated to and colonized parts of Europe, the Middle East, and Africa too, primarily the Western coast because they traveled there by boat from the Northern Atlantic Ocean. They pillaged, they traded, and mingled in all of these places, thus why the bloodline traces add up. I doubt me having this blood in me is due to any fortunate circumstance, which is a little saddening, but it is what it is I guess. There is really no way to know for sure, so what can I say?

Happy Leif Erikson Day?

It's interesting however, since I've been remotely interested in Scandinavian music for awhile, mostly in the Rock and Metal variety. Not that it's traditional or cultural in any way, but in a modern sense I would say it is a huge part of Scandinavian pop culture at the very least.

I also love snow and cooler temperatures? I mean I do...

Yea, not saying I AM Scandinavian now because of a quarter drop of ethnic ancestry, but that doesn't mean I shouldn't take the time to explore this unknown part of what makes up my biological makeup.

And there is Irish as well, which in a way derives from Scandinavia to begin with. There is lots of similarity in the cultures, and a lot of migration involved.

Nigerian Celtic Viking? Hmm ok.

And some Viking dipped a toe into Iraq for two minutes, thus the less than one percent Middle Eastern ethnicity? I'm not counting that though since it seems rather inconclusive.

At the end of the day I still identify as Black, and being that is the majority of my ethnic background, and how I present to others outwardly, I will continue to embrace this fact.

There is much more research to be done. I'm so curious about the genetic makeup of my other family members now as well so I can get a clear trace and perhaps uncover more similarities and differences. I hope I can convince others in my family to try it too!


Can't wait to learn more about all the cultures that make up my ethnicity, I will be sharing my experiences here going forward!

"MY MUSIC IS BETTER THAN YOURS!" - Reflection and Discussion Post

Hello everyone! First off, Happy New Year! It's 2016, and I'm ready for a very exciting and eventful year. I have a lot of things up and coming, and I've made some positive changes in my life. I'm hoping to make this a great year, but only time will tell.

Anyway, I just wanted to get some thoughts down on a subject that I have been thinking a bit about lately. The topic is music, and it's a but of a multi faceted question I want to discuss my thoughts and get input from others on:

• Why is it that certain types of music become strikingly more popular than others in mainstream media? (Let's keep to the USA for this one)
• Why are certain types of music not as widely appealing to a broader audience (instead of a niche one?)
• Why do some people outright reject certain kinds of music based on narrow-minded views? (Language, deeper meaning to lyrics, instruments used, race/ethnicity of the performers)

I brought these questions up recently after my boyfriend went on a holiday trip to South Africa to visit family members there (just to clarify, because the question tends to be asked, he is in fact Black African, this will be remotely of importance later) and the question of his music tastes came up. 

Basically, him being interested in mostly Japanese music was thought to be strange by his fellow family members, who almost exclusively listen to American Rap and Hip-Hop music. As many of us of African descent growing up in America, we are expected to follow suit, and his family expected that of him to, but it's farthest from the case. He does listen to some, but his passion is in Japanese music - mostly J-Rock and J-Pop to be more specific. 

There is this stigma in the Black Community that if your music tastes aren't Rap, Hip Hop, and R&B, then you are an outsider. Your music, if it doesn't fall into those genres, is "too White."

My question always is, when the hell did music just belong to any specific race? I can understand said music originating from people of a certain race or ethnicity, but not the entire genre being a "race." Give credit where it's due but don't go denouncing people's musical tastes as though liking music made by someone not the same as you means you can't enjoy it. Seriously, that notion infuriates me to no end. 

You can watch his video on the topic here (from YouTube):

That then brings me to my tastes in music, which I had been ridiculed for in the past for the very same reasons. I mostly listen to music in the Rock/Metal/Alternative variety with a toss of Dance/Techno/Happy Hardcore and of course Classical Music. 

My favorite musical genre at the moment is Symphonic Rock/Metal (Moi Dix Mois, Versailles, Malice Mizer, Delain, Epica, Within Temptation, Sirenia, Nightwish, just to name a few.) Anyway, these genres are practically ignored as a whole by the wider Black Community. To my knowledge there are none or not many Black musical artists who participate in the genre either (but if I could make music, I would be so in that trust me...) It makes me a little sad, but I don't let that stop me from listening to whatever I want. 

But, going back a bit before I get off topic, let's address our initial questions.

Why is it that certain types of music become strikingly more popular than others in mainstream media?

It's sadly simple, in my opinion, why this is. The general public, or the masses, like whatever is easy to consume. They like music with a hook, a catchy beat, generally upbeat sounding, and music that plays into their fantasies. People like music about partying, sexy women/men, finding love, driving fast cars, and getting riches. The melodies are often simple and easy to grasp. In comparison, many Symphonic Metal songs in contrast have very deep and heavy lyrics often melancholy (many about death, love lost, deep despair, and extreme emotion.) They have fast paced rifts and percussions that can be taxing on the ear of the "normal" person. The melodies are often more complicated and ever changing. This is why I think simpler Pop and Hip Hop songs hit the Top 40 and are regularly played on the radio because they are simply "easy on the ear" and make people feel fanciful. Is there more to it though? 

Why are certain types of music not as widely appealing to a broader audience?

It's not that I want my favorite music to become mainstream and played out, but I really do wonder sometimes why don't genres other than Pop and Hip Hop/R&B get any real recognition? All the music on the radio sounds the same, like a carbon copy with a different voice. I feel as though people aren't really given a chance to even like anything different. Kids know all the songs that play on the radio like if those are the only songs that exist. 

I grew up on an additional divide. I'm Afro-Caribbean, My family is from the Islands on both sides, so I do have cultural genres such as Reggae, Soca, and Calypso to identify with, and I do enjoy them, but I always looked for more. I was not a "follow the herd" type of girl. Thanks to the internet, I was able to discover, around the ages of 13-15, a lot of the music I still listen to religiously to this very day.

I feel like people are simply not exposed to enough music. Either they don't have the desire to seek it out, they might be afraid to stray from the pack, or they just don't know where to start? It could be a marketing thing, like maybe certain music was just never meant to reach a wider audience on purpose? Like the creators or small fan base want to keep it niche, which is fair. I'm not entirely sure how to answer this question with definition.

There is also musical theory which plays into why music even sounds "good" to the human ear. Just like there is the Golden Rule in mathematics involving symmetry, the same applies to music as well. Notes aren't just strung together at random to create music. It's chaotic to hear someone smash a piano keyboard or guitar strings haphazardly. However, for a musical piece to be truly astounding, it must have all the appeal I stated previously and follow the Golden Rule - and there is your hit song! 

Science. 

Why do some people outright reject certain kinds of music based on narrow-minded views? 

This is what really bothers me the most. I've heard people denounce music for the silliest of reasons. Some people refuse to listen to music unless they can understand the language. That's being said, again I also listen to a lot of Japanese music. I also listen to music in many other languages. It's easy enough to look up the lyric translations for any song in the world these days. Not being able to understand is not an excuse. It's stupid, plain and simple. 

I find this reigns true with many of my fellow Americans. Our music, music in the English language generally speaking (I guess we can include music from Europe as well) is regarded highly globally, especially if it's a well known song or artist. But music in other languages do not get the same recognition here in America. Most music in any other language besides English can't even get on the Top 40 list, and if there is one, the most we'd get is one song in Spanish (since it's the country's second language), and even then it's often mixed with English or has a repetitive hook of the same Spanish phrase over and over. 

Also, is it conditioning? Does it come from ones parents and family, the renouncing of non-mainstream music? Media outposts dictating what you see, or in this case, hear? We are often taught, as Westerners, and as Americans, that everything we produce from all angles, are superior to that of the rest of the world, and I'm sure that includes music. We are told to like the music that "our people" like (or are supposed to like? I don't even...) is the music we should be listening to. That music is a trend, and not something to be cherished. That lyrics don't matter so long as you can bump and grind to it. 

I believe, music is much more. Music is meant to be analyzed and picked apart. It's meant to be explored across boundaries of geography, time, culture, and language. It's meant to bring you up or down. It's meant to convey a deeper message or meaning, even a subliminal one. It's meant to be understood fully and with reason. 

Music is life. 

Please share your thoughts on this subject, I'm very eager to hear input from others on this topic. Remember, everything I said here is opinion, and not fact, so if you disagree with anything I said, none of it is absolute, its simply just my opinion which can be different from yours. 

Thanks for reading! 

Taobao Mini Haul + Review of Fox's Feathers Death Angel JSK

Hello everyone! It's been quiet around these parts for a bit, but hopefully I can get back into the swing of things on this blog again. Today I bring a mini haul and review of some recent Taobao purchases I made! For those of you who don;t know what Taobao is, it's a shopping site sort of like Amazon where you can buy a multitude of items from sellers all over China. Things however can tend to be hit or miss, so it's important to buy with caution and look out for scammers, knock-offs, and bad quality items. Just as you would be cautious on sites like eBay and the like, the same applies here.

To shop on Taobao, if you are from the West, you would need to use a shopping service. My service of choice is spreenow.com. Their site is very streamlined and easy to use, and their customer service is impeccable! I highly recommend using their service. They charge a 10% service fee for every purchase as well as paypal fees. In the long run, it's very cheap and even cheaper when you buy as a group, just keep in mind that the cost of shipping to you will increase the heavier the items are, so shoes and bags really drive up the costs by the end.

Anyway, I will assume most of you reading this are familiar with Taobao at least remotely, and are familiar with the many Lolita Fashion brands that are over there. Some of my favorites to list a few are Infanta, Krad Lanrete, Little Dipper, Boguta, Surface Spell, and Pumpkin Cat. If you are interested, here is a link to a comprehensive list of fairly trusted lolita brands on Taobao. Just keep in mind that some shops no longer update or can take very long to ship items (sometimes up to six months or more!) So again, be weary. Your taobao agent should be able to help you contact the shops to find out how long items will take.

Ok onto the items!

Infanta - Burgundy Striped Blouse

 with Pointed Collar and Gold Trims

Quality - 3.5/5

No link because they blouse is currently not available. 

This is quite a lovely blouse I must say. Sadly, at the time of purchase, they no longer had Size M in stock, so I had to buy a Size L. I tried it on, and it is rather big in the bust. Eventually I plan to take it in myself so it fits me a bit better. 

I had to rank this down in quality because the bow brooch broke in two places. One of the crosses came off as it was attached with really cheap nickel plated rings. I was able to re-attach, but I can see them falling off again. I will need to use pliers to really close the loop more securely. Then when I tried attaching the brooch, the pin back completely broke off. I will have to replace that too. So basically, the hardware on this blouse sucked. But overall, it's nice for what I paid (about $40 USD give or take.)

Infanta - Mutton-style Sleeve Chiffon Blouse

Quality - 4.5/5

Available at this link!

I actually bought this blouse in a previous Group Order. I got the Ivory, and then I loved it so much that I ended up getting the black one this time too! It was hard to resist buying every color, as they have many to choose from! I really recommend this blouse! It fits amazingly! The sleeves are so fluffy! It;s very versatile and perfect for both Gothic and Classic looks! These blouses pretty much go with everything in my wardrobe, and I love them. They each cost me about $40 USD.

Ranked down only because I had to sew the top button back on because it fell off, and because the elastic on the sleeves are quite tight, so be very mindful of that. It's like that for a lot of Taobao blouses. I guess they want the elastics to stretch out over time and wear, or they think everyone has pencil wrists, haha. 

Little Angel - Black Striped Blouse 
with Gold Lurex and Detachable Bow

Quality -  4.5/5

This one is my favorite blouse of the three! Sadly its not available on their site anymore, but they do have the same blouse in other colors available here! This brand is a branch off from Little Dipper. 

I just love this. The fabric is soft and has a bit of spandex for a nice comfy fit! I love the detachable bow. It has a very quirky and circusy feel to it, and I'm sure I will be getting a lot of wear out of this. I kind of want more colors now! I bought their Size M and as I said, the fit is perfect with only one flaw - the sleeves are a bit short. I have fairly long arms, so be weary of that. It's not drastic, but it's noticeable when I bend my arms. I don't mind it too much though. 

Fox's Feathers - Death Angel JSK II

Quality - 4.5/5

I ultimately decided on the long length JSK in Black, which I don't regret! This goes right past my knee and looks great on.

I was completely floored at the quality of this piece. The fabric has a nice texture to it and doesn't feel cheap and it isn't shiny at all. This dress is also no longer available as far as I know, as there was a bit of controversy about copyrighted art regarding this dress. The link I bought it from is no longer available for some odd reason. Apparently the issue was rectified, but I still wonder, haha! 

Anyway, there are really rich and great quality laces and trims on this piece. The only thing I don't like is the lacing at the front is a little awkward, but I don't mind it. I also wish the waist tie was attached. It's a loose sash instead. However, it does give you varied options to tie it. The dress zips at the back, which is hard to get off and on, I would have preferred a side zip. I also wish the back was fully shirred, it would have been even more comfy that way, the bodice is a just fit for me. I like my shirring dammit!

Ultimatum? I think this was a good ass mini haul!

Coordinate One 

Elder Witch

Here is a mature Gothic look. I used the JSK and the Blouse I received, that match perfectly. I paired it with a Gunmetal wig (from Lockshop), a circular veiled headdress I made, and a Moss Marchen gold rosary. I threw in my good ol' trusty Evil Live school bag like always (I only have two lolita purses currently, and this is my main one. I'm not one to collect purses. I just like having my staples that I can use over and over in many outfits.)

I would pair this with some black lace tights and witchy boots!

Coordinate Two

Spoopy Time

If you know me well enough, you will realize that I wear spoopy Halloweeny shit all year round, so I cracked up this number. 

I recently also got the Metamorphose Secret Laboratory Long JSK in Emerald, and then I put it next to this blouse, and they are a match made in heaven! At first I didn't like this dress because I thought it was a textured cotton when I was on the website, but when it came in, it was Chiffon, and I was a little disappointed (I didn't read, I just clicked BUY.) But I think it's growing on me now! The blouse is like a soft woven cotton, so the mixing of textures is nice!

I added a bunch of other spoopy touches, like the Moss Badger Ouija necklace, Skeleton clips, and my new Aetherlund Batwing cuffs. I threw in the harlequin tights for a little circus feel. Also if you know me well enough, I like mixing crazy unexpected nonsense together! I topped this off with a sparkly veiled headbow and some clip in roses. I need more gold hair accessories!

I would have done more coords, but it got late and I got very tired, but if you check out my Instagram, I post random coords when I'm feeling inspired, so do look for them over there! Lately I've been loving the regalia and gothic stuff, so there has been a lot of that.

Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed!

- Aria Macabre